Options By Popularity
Options 1977 to 1987
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Have all your close friends die
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Be cursed to have the head of a donkey. You are unable to speak and can only make braying sounds.
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Burn to death
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Be an extremely ugly goat who smells like urine and excretes outrageous amounts earwax
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From now on all food tastes like vomit to you
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Be tied down for the rest of your life, with no chance of escape, while a dozen leprechauns dance around you singing "la-la-la-la-la-la-la!!"
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Be 9 months pregnant for the rest of your life
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Your eyeballs are replaced with the same volume of salted peanuts
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Feed yourself with your worst enemy's poop for a whole month (you can drink whatever you want)
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Your legs and body from the chest down are replaced by an upright vacuum cleaner. A handle mounted on your spine lets others push you around easily but you can't move under your own power.