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  1. Have large rat-like incisors. They grow continuously, requiring you to gnaw on things or grind them regularly to keep them from getting too long
  2. Over a 40 day period the water level of the earth rises to 1 foot above Mount Everest, it stays at that level for 40 days, then recedes over 40 days.
  3. Every morning you must wait while makeup is applied to make you appear as a Klingon
  4. Never be able to eat solid food again
  5. Wherever you go, all electronic devices within 10 meters of you disintegrate
  6. Have an odd and irritating little laugh after every sentence you utter (uncontrollably), all the time
  7. Your only method for communicating with other humans was Facebook
  8. Get put in an insane asylum when you're not crazy
  9. Have an arm for a leg
  10. Find out that your spouse had a sex change before they met you


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