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  1. Be drunk all the time
  2. All beautiful girls appear as manatees to you
  3. Never be allowed to eat your favorite food ever again
  4. Work as a personal maid
  5. Be only able to hop like a kangaroo instead of walking or running normally
  6. Have a bear come to your house every day and slap you
  7. Live on the lam
  8. Whenever you're stressed or excited you bark like a dog
  9. Drink a bottle of Soylent
  10. Eat birds nest soup


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