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Options 967 to 977
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Helena, Montana, and all of its occupants cease to exist
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Eat a package of Ichiban
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Each morning your alarm clock squirts gravy on your face
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Never eat cereal again
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Become an immortal sorceress with mind-control powers but permanently transform into an enormous black cobra-like serpent with a human face.
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Get pinkeye
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Have car drive over your foot
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Be one of Santa's elves
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When you die you go on to a blissful afterlife AS LONG AS the last word you ever said was "sky". If that is not the case then you will instead go on to an afterlife of torment.
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Never take a good picture