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  1. Become an old man
  2. Every time you wake up Tim Burton is laying beside you with his arm draped over you
  3. Have your best friend betray you
  4. Put your bare hand up to the wrist into disgusting and effluent filled bus station toilet bowl
  5. Have your house burn down
  6. Have a life that is not tried but is merely survived
  7. The earth is subdivided by major lines of longitude and latitude and the pieces are shot apart with enough force that their own gravity will not bring them back together.
  8. A cyborg from the future is trying to kill you for reasons it won't explain
  9. Give birth naturally to a nine pound child
  10. Have a snail-like shell


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