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Options 1420 to 1430
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You're being chased by a fast zombie
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Be cursed to change into a donkey any time someone calls you an "ass", only changing back when someone calls you a "human"
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The option that this is paired with doesn't happen. Instead you dream that it happens every single night. It is the only dream you have for the rest of your life.
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Wash your face in a urinal
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Have 12 children
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Everything you touched turned into gold
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Live without technology
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Have a really bad toothache
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Be a dwarf
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Humans were born in a limbless larval state similar to a giant maggot with a humanoid face. They're as intelligent as normal children and can learn to speak but only metamorphose into adult form around their sixteenth birthday.