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  1. Be killed in a quick and painless way
  2. Only speak Chinese in America
  3. Smell like Soy-Sauce
  4. Shrink to 1/12 of your regular height (while remaining fully functional and properly proportioned)
  5. Be named Hitler
  6. Have a tail that never stops wagging, causing you to break things and smack people wherever you go
  7. Everyone except you loses the ability to read and can never relearn
  8. Live in a world where everything sounds creepy
  9. Fight in World War II
  10. Have mean parents


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